First Day of "School"

It is hard for me to believe that I am actually putting this into words, but today was Addison's first day of "school."

I guess I should clarify the word "school." It is an organized summer program for kids at a local church - the same church where she will be attending pre-school in the fall. While it isn't as structured as the pre-school program in the fall, the kids still go three days a week for four hours a day.

We have been talking to her about going to school for months and I don't think she really understood it until this morning when she saw her lunch packed and her back pack sitting by the door. Yesterday all she could talk about was riding the bus to school so I was worried that this morning there would be a major meltdown about not getting to take a school bus ride. However, she climbed up in her seat and could talk about nothing other than eating her lunch with her friends. She kept telling me to drive faster too so I know she understood where we were going. We were the first ones there so she had plenty of time to scout out her classroom and the teacher's aid seemed to all ready be taken with her by the time I left. And I should mention that when I told her I was leaving, she didn't seem to upset about it and hardly could take the time to come give me a hug. Broke my heart just a little.

I will fully admit that I have been looking forward to this day for a very long time. Having four hours to myself? How could I not look forward to that? But as I drove away from the school, I couldn't stop the tears from falling down my face. How could she be old enough for a school program? It seems like just yesterday we were bringing her home fromt the hospital. Needless to say, the morning has been bittersweet for me. It was hard not to be excited for her because I could see how excited she was about going to school, but at the same time, it was sad for me to admit that she is growing up - and I will admit she is doing that growing up WAY tooooooo fast.

I started my free time by walking at the park that is between our house and the school. After my walk, I went to Panera to get an iced mocha and croissant. I thought I was doing fine. Than I came home. This house is so quiet when she isn't here, and to top it off the dogs are looking at me like "where is our little buddy?" I guess it is a good thing that my house is a mess today. I plan to turn up my tunes and get cleaning. I know that will take my mind off of her not being here and make the time go fast. And I know in a few days, I will be used to it and will be able to spend my free time doing things that are more fun than cleaning - but I have to get used to my little side-kick being gone for most of the day first!